Say It Out Loud
by Momo Cicerone
Summary: The Raijinshu trio debate about the origin and accuracy of Elfman's name. The man in question strongly disagrees. [*ElfEver / ElfGreen*] Hilarity ensues. And some cotton candy fluff smeared all over the ending as you should expect from me. T for language and some slightly mature content.


**Summary:** The Raijinshu trio debate about the origin and accuracy of Elfman's name. The man in question strongly disagrees. [*ElfEver / ElfGreen*] Hilarity ensues. And some cotton candy fluff smeared all over the ending as you should expect from me. T for language and some slightly mature content.

**A/N: **I swear to God I didn't plan this and I DO have a lot of unfinished Gruvia drabbles (Edo and Earth), but one night I was in the shower and BOOM! This sorta came out. And I loved it. I didn't even ship Elfever/Elfgreen before that insightful shower of mine lol, but once I started writing, I really fell in love with them and now I truly understand why people OTP them.

Special thanks to **Amenah** who beta-ed the crap out of this and her wonderful input which made this fic 10,000 times better than it originally was.

I wrote this two months ago but for some inexplicable reason this page wouldn't let me upload. Hope it works this time!

.

.

.

**Say It Out Loud**

_By Momo Cicerone_

.

.

Fairy Tail's bar resonated with the chatter of the guild's many noisy members, the majority of whom were drinking the cool beverages being handed out by their popular and smiling barmaid. In a dark corner at the back of the room, the Raijinshu trio were having a most entertaining conversation.

"'_Elfman_', pffttt! What kind of name is that?" Evergreen snorted. "I mean, do you see any resemblance to a tiny, pointy-eared elf? If anything, he should be called 'Trollman' or 'Ogreman'."

She flashed a smug grin as Bickslow split his sides with laughter, unable to contain his mirth. Freed shot her an amused look, his lips never leaving the orange drink in his hand. After all, he was the classiest of the three of them. Who the hell else drinks cocktails at 10am on a Tuesday morning? None other than _the gentleman_ himself, for sure.

"It's not manly to talk about people behind their backs!" a dark voice grunted, and the trio turned to find Elfman looming over them, a menacing look flashing in his eyes.

"I'm a woman, you idiot!" the brunette snapped, narrowing her eyes.

"_Tch._ All the same. And what exactly is the problem with my name? At least it's _manly_."

"Yeah, just 'cos it ends in 'man'," Bickslow pointed out.

"That's good enough for me," Elfman said proudly. "What about you? Are you particularly _slow_?" He raised an eyebrow towards Freed. "Were you _exonerated_ from prison?"

"Your gags sucks, man. Seriously." Bickslow shook his head before taking a sip of his beer.

"Tasteless sense of humor," Freed chimed in.

The take-over mage ignored their comments and scowled at Evergreen. "And you, what's the big deal? Are you recyclable? Are you going to stay young forever?"

"Fuck you. Maybe I will," she hissed.

"_Che_…"Elfman sniffed loudly. "Or maybe you're meant to for_ever_ be_ green_ about everything. Like my awesome name," he teased.

"Here's a wooden puppet. You can stick it where the sun don–."

"_OI!_ HANDS OFF MY BABY!" The seith mage rushed to retrieve the doll from Evergreen's grip. "Jeez. Can I ask for some respect here, please!? You can't just take my baby and get filthy shit on it!"

The offending fairy shrugged and opened the palms of her hands as if presenting an obvious statement. "It won't feel anything after it explodes, Bickslow."

"But _I'll_ be the one scarred for life, thank you very much," he retorted grumpily.

"Stop whining and fight me like a man!" Elfman bellowed, clutching his fists.

"I'll pass. I ain't getting my babies anywhere near _you_," Bickslow grimaced. "But if you're hoping to get your ass kicked," he added with a malicious smirk, "I'm sure Laxus could do a little warm up with you."

"That's right," Freed nodded enthusiastically in agreement. "_My_ Laxus could take you out in a second."

"Oi, oi, stop that! fanboying is not _manly_" the silver haired man barked with a grimace.

Bixlow threw Elfman a look of disgust before loudly, snidely remarking, "Says the guy who fangirls over masculinity every three minutes?"

"Are you tainting my devotion for Laxus as something wrong? 'Cos if that's the case—"

"I think _Dinoman_ suits you better," Evergreen interrupted, her finger resting on her chin as if she were in deep thought.

"The hell does that mean!?" a sweat-dropping Elfman demanded to know.

The girl pushed her glasses up her nose and smirked. "Isn't it obvious? You're like a freaking dinosaur. Big build, peanut size brain—"

"_Fossilized _brain's more like it," Bickslow corrected.

"_Tch._" The man in question dismissed their comments with a flick of the head, folding his brawny arms over his chest. "I'm a man. I like women. That's what a real man does."

"Yea, yea. Why don't you knock _this one _over and drag her by the hair like a real _Caveman_?" the puppeteer said in a bored tone. "Oh, that name would suit you too, by the way."

"Shut up!" Evergreen glowered at her smirking nakama, clearly fuming as her cheeks burned twenty shades of red.

"As if!" Elfman blustered indignantly, unable to hide the hint of guilt in his voice.

"Alrighty, enough of the chitter chatter. I'm out of here. C'mon Freed, let's go." Bickslow stood up and headed to the exit with no further comment. The Raijinshu captain finished his fruity cocktail before throwing Elfman a dirty look and heading off to follow his partner.

Their absence left an awkward silence. Evergreen and Elfman glanced at each other, eyes meeting.

"_Humph!_" She exclaimed, turning her face away and walking away from him with her nose in the air.

"_Tch_." He took the opposite road and lumbered away.

.

* * *

.

Elfman stood stiffly in front of the sofa on which Evergreen was sitting comfortably in. His muscular physique cast menacing shadows over her curvaceous figure, and his expression was obscured in darkness. The tension between them, however, was so palpable she didn't need to see his face to feel it.

"Care to explain?" he asked through gritted teeth, eyes glowing dangerously.

"I don't know what you're talking about," she huffed, looking away from his piercing glare.

He leaned forward so that his face was only inches away from hers, his warm breath dusting her cheeks as he whispered, "Trollman? Ogreman? _Dinoman_? What the hell's with that!?"

She pursed her lips and turned to meet his gaze. "You told me to pretend in front of the others! And you weren't very nice to me either, if I recall correctly!" she retorted, pushing him away and standing up to put some distance between them.

"I told you to _pretend_, not to go around mouthing off my name," Elfman argued, walking a few steps towards her.

She straightened up and folded her arms across her chest. "I wasn't mouthing you off! It was just a joke, _jeez_. It's not my fault you have the sense of humor of a gargoyle!"

"I don't get your stony jokes, Medusa."

"Ha freaking _ha_," she deadpanned. "Fucking hilarious. Keep being an ass and I'll take my glasses off," she threatened him, narrowing her eyes.

"Fucking go for it. I can do a lot of things with my eyes closed," Elfman said flippantly.

She raised an eyebrow and gave him an evaluating look. "Oh, yeah, Mister Fantastic? Things like what?"

"Things like this—" he murmured as he leaned closer to her.

She gasped as he grabbed her ass and pulled her up to his height, pulling her lips to his. His muscular arm steadied her body against his rock-hard chest, his free hand meanwhile digging into the curly locks at the nape of her neck. His tongue caressed her lips gently in a way his rough hands could never possibly match. She felt so small and fragile in his arms, as if she were some dainty precious thing that he was afraid of breaking. He sucked her lower lip; she opened her mouth to deepen the kiss, moaning as he tangled his tongue with her own.

She was warm and soft, and her generous breasts pressing against his skin felt so nice he had to gather all his willpower to pull away. She stared at him dizzily as he gently placed her feet back on the floor, and he smirked at her arrogantly.

"Alright. Point proven," she conceded, her breath coming out in pants, her lips red from friction. "Are your sisters home tonight?"

"Not a chance. I made sure of it," he said, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear.

She shot him a suspicious look. "Why so sure?"

He grinded his teeth and muttered, "You really pissed me off today. So I'm going to make you like my name."

"And how exactly is that going to happen?" she pushed skeptically, smirking despite herself.

"You're gonna say it out loud." A faint squeal escaped Evergreen's lips as he pulled her off her feet, sweeping her up and carrying her bridal-style. "All through the night," he added, making her blush wildy from hairline to chin.

"Elfman!" she pouted indignantly.

Said man roared a deep laugh that simultaneously melted her heart and made her insides twist in anticipation.

"That's a good start," he grinned approvingly. "But I've heard you do better."

Evergreen had no further objections whatsoever, letting him carry her into his bedroom and close the door behind them.

.

* * *

_**Fin.**_

_**.**_

Reviews will be _highly_ appreciated. Pretty please? (puppy eyes)


End file.
